Talking Casually with Friends (반말)
Learn how to turn polite -요 sentences into casual 반말, how to ask 말 놓을까요?, and who you can (and cannot) speak casually with.
Narae · Everyday conversation & today's KoreanWhat you will learn in this lesson
- Change -아요/어요 sentences into casual -아/어
- Use 응, 아니, -야/이야 and casual questions like 뭐 해?
- Know when 반말 is friendly and when it is rude
- Ask politely to switch to 반말 with 말 놓을까요?
Hi again! With my classmates I never use -요. We talk in 반말, casual speech. But with my teachers, I always use -요. Today I'll show you how 반말 works and, most importantly, when you are allowed to use it.
What is 반말?
반말 is casual speech. The polite style with -요 is called 존댓말. Many Korean textbooks teach 존댓말 first, and that is the right choice: it is safe almost everywhere.
반말 is for close relationships. You can use it with close friends of the same age, with people younger than you after you know each other well, with family members you are close to (children often use 반말 with their parents), and with someone older who has told you it is okay.
You should not use 반말 with strangers, shop staff, customers, teachers, bosses, coworkers, or anyone older who has not invited you to. Using 반말 too early can sound rude or cold, even if you smile.
The easiest way to make 반말: take the present, past or future -요 sentence and remove -요.
- 가요 → 가, 먹어요 → 먹어, 해요 → 해
- 갔어요 → 갔어, 먹었어요 → 먹었어
- 갈 거예요 → 갈 거야 (예요 becomes 야)
- Questions stay the same; just raise your voice at the end: 가? 먹어?
- 지금 가요. → 지금 가. jigeum gayo. → jigeum ga.I'm going now.
- 밥 먹었어요? → 밥 먹었어? [밤 머거써요? → 밤 머거써?] bap meogeosseoyo? → bap meogeosseo?Did you eat?
- 내일 바빠요. → 내일 바빠. naeil bappayo. → naeil bappa.I'm busy tomorrow.
- 영화 볼 거예요. → 영화 볼 거야. [영화 볼 꺼예요. → 영화 볼 꺼야.] yeonghwa bol geoyeyo. → yeonghwa bol geoya.I'm going to watch a movie.
"It is N" in 반말. After a consonant use 이야; after a vowel use 야.
- 학생이에요 → 학생이야 (consonant ending)
- 친구예요 → 친구야 (vowel ending)
- 아니에요 → 아니야 ("no, it isn't")
- 나는 대학생이야. naneun daehaksaengiya.I'm a university student.
- 이거 내 가방이야. igeo nae gabangiya.This is my bag.
- 걔는 내 친구야. gyaeneun nae chinguya.That person is my friend.
- 아니야, 괜찮아. [아니야, 괜차나.] aniya, gwaenchana.No, it's fine.
Small words that change
| Polite | Casual | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| 네 / 예 | 응 / 어 | Yes |
| 아니요 | 아니 | No |
| 저 | 나 | I |
| 제가 | 내가 | I (subject) |
| 제 이름 | 내 이름 | My name |
| 안녕하세요 | 안녕 | Hello |
| 고마워요 | 고마워 | Thanks |
| 미안해요 | 미안해 | Sorry |
Note: 어 as "yeah" is very casual and is mostly spoken.
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Everyday casual questions
- 뭐 해? mwo hae? What are you doing? A very common greeting in messages between friends.
- 밥 먹었어? [밤 머거써?] bap meogeosseo? Did you eat? Also works like "How are you?" between close friends.
- 어디야? eodiya? Where are you? Short and casual. Polite: 어디예요? or 어디세요?
- 괜찮아? [괜차나?] gwaenchana? Are you okay?
- 내일 시간 있어? [내일 시간 이써?] naeil sigan isseo? Do you have time tomorrow?
- 같이 갈래? [가치 갈래?] gachi gallae? Do you want to go together?
- 응, 좋아! eung, joa! Yeah, sounds good!
- 아니, 오늘은 좀 피곤해. ani, oneureun jom pigonhae. No, I'm a bit tired today.
In Korea, you don't just start using 반말. You ask first! Even two people of the same age usually agree on it. Asking is polite and shows you care.
Asking to switch: 말 놓기
- 우리 말 놓을까요? [우리 말 노을까요?] uri mal noeulkkayo? Shall we speak casually? 말을 놓다 means "to drop polite speech." Common between people of a similar age.
- 편하게 말 놓으세요. [편하게 말 노으세요.] pyeonhage mal noeuseyo. Please feel free to speak casually (to me). Said by an older person to a younger one. Now the younger one may use 반말, but many still keep -요 with someone much older.
- 우리 동갑이네요! 말 편하게 할까요? [우리 동가비네요! 말 편하게 할까요?] uri donggabineyo! mal pyeonhage halkkayo? We're the same age! Shall we talk comfortably? 동갑 means "the same age."
- 그래, 좋아. 이제 반말하자! geurae, joa. ije banmalhaja! Sure, great. Let's use 반말 now!
너 or the person's name?
- 너 neo you (casual) Fine with close friends and younger people, but it can sound direct. Never use 너 with older people or strangers. Many Koreans prefer to use the name instead.
- 민수야 / 지은아 minsuya / jieuna Minsu! / Jieun! (calling a friend) Add 야 after a vowel and 아 after a consonant: 민수야, 지은아. This sounds warm and friendly.
- 민수는 뭐 먹을래? [민수는 뭐 머글래?] minsuneun mwo meogeullae? What do you want to eat, Minsu? Koreans often use the name where English uses "you," even when talking directly to the person.
From polite to casual
When 반말 becomes rude
Even with good intentions, 반말 can hurt someone. Here are common mistakes:
Using 반말 with service staff. Saying 물 줘 ("give me water") to a server sounds rude. Say 물 좀 주세요.
Using 반말 because someone looks young. Age is hard to guess. Wait until you know.
Using 반말 at work. Even with a coworker your age, most workplaces expect -요 and job titles.
Using 반말 online with strangers. In comments and chats with people you don't know, polite speech is safer.
If you make a mistake, just say 아, 죄송해요 and continue with -요. Koreans know learning this is hard!
Check quiz
Q1. What is the casual form of 먹었어요?
Q2. Choose the casual form of 친구예요.
Q3. How do you call your friend 지은 in a friendly way?
Q4. Who is it usually okay to use 반말 with?
Q5. Which sentence asks to switch to casual speech?
Q6. What is the casual way to say "yes"?
You did it! Remember: -요 is always safe, and 반말 is a gift of closeness. When a Korean friend says 말 놓자!, it means you are really friends now. 축하해!
Key points
- 반말 = drop -요: 가요 → 가, 먹었어요 → 먹었어
- 이에요/예요 → 이야/야; 네 → 응; 아니요 → 아니; 저 → 나
- Use 반말 only with close friends of the same age or younger, or when invited
- Ask first: 우리 말 놓을까요?
- Call friends by name + 아/야 instead of 너
Recommended official free resources
- Korean Basic Dictionary (multilingual) — National Institute of Korean Language
- Nuri-Sejong Hakdang — King Sejong Institute Foundation
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